running commentary

The past few months, I’ve been spending a lot of time meditating on the essence of following Christ. The complexities of working with a tri-language, multi-cultural, but primarily one ethnicity church has sent my head reeling. Add to that a diversity and differences of Christian backgrounds within the congregation, and the sudden responsibility of being the sole full time pastoral worker at the church has begun to weigh heavily on my heart, soul and mind.

The longer i puzzled over these differences, the more my mind became muddled and befuddled.

And so I found myself, a bit like a teacher of the law striving to understand the complexities of teaching, leading and living, coming before Jesus and asking, “what is the most important thing?” Between, teaching, preaching, inspiring, guiding, praying, prophesying, evangelising, holiness, and social action – what is the most important thing? What is the law by which i should live?

“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.”
This is the first and great commandment.

A second likewise is this, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”

It seems so simple, yet so complex. That at the end of the day, it boils down to loving God with my heart, my soul and mind. And loving my neighbour as myself. The entirety of Christian ministry and direction comes down to those two commandments. Life with Jesus opens the door to that love, and love of God and man begins with Jesus.

And though the daunting prospect and responsibility of serving the church in Birmingham remains, the fear of condemnation and failure begins to melt away as the focus turns again to the love of God. There is no greater joy than to love God, and in turn let that love pour out onto all around.

“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear has punishment. He who fears is not made perfect in love.”

let’s see… what’s happened since i turned 34?

The Ho family took me to my first football match. Liverpool vs the Birmingham Blues. Amazing, i felt for a moment, completely immersed in British culture. Obviously, i had to restrain my joy everytime liverpool scored, because we were sitting on the Blues supporters side. Though part of me did want to see the Blues win to avoid relegation… unfortunately… that was not to be. But that was fantastic fun, and all around good times.

We took a trip to SF and Vancouver, where I had a chance to see some old friends, and some friends from UK (ros, bok & lei), and meet some new friends as well. Alex and Betty had a beautiful wedding, and i was honoured to be able to give the homily for the ceremony.

Alex had his first international flight, and my parents had a good chance to spend some time with him.

I guess this is a pretty boring news update, with very little interesting thoughts, or tidbits like that. But at least you get a little picture of what’s going on with life out here.

read this quote today..
“Sin deforms, education informs, religion reforms but God transforms”

i can’t believe i’m already thirty four.

a decade or so ago i moved to the UK. here i started working with COCM and was placed at the Sheffield Chinese Christian Church. There i lived in Watson Road – the house with the orange curtains. My first few weeks in Sheffield, i learned not to drink from the hot tap, had my first encounters with Malaysians and Singaporeans, and discovered how little i knew about loving people.

in my years in Sheffield, i got to work, grow, and love a group of youth who formed Topic. Serving alongside Dick Lee, we had the chance to work with youth and youth leaders all over the country. And in Sheffield, i had the pleasure of working with Sam, Esther, Becky, Adrian, and even Kiet.

And just last Sunday, i met a girl who was at the NEEC where I told Mike, Eric, and Tommy that i was going to leave Sheffield and move to Birmingham. Heartbreaking times i tell you. And yet, it was also time for them to grow.

5 years ago i married Phan – and the journey in Birmingham took new turns. Serving in the BCEC, where the English group was about 10-15 people, a mixture of adults and teens. Then watching as God made the group grow – and i learned about trusting Him, and following His rhythm and tempo.

And last August Alex was born, and even though i may have tons of spiritual children, this is my first biological one. And the journey continues.

It’s been crazy – cause watching the way God weaves lives to interact with each other is amazing and fantastic. At the MEC i met a guy who learnt guitar from one of the teens in Sheffield. Sam & Esther have moved to Hong Kong where they serve God full time. And still there are even more amazing stories everyday. It’s just so unbelievable sometimes.

Even in the past ten years i’ve been in the UK, there have been times of joy and times of sorrow. Tears of celebration and uncontainable joy – and times of crying out to God and desperation. I’ve learnt so much, and still so much to learn. I’m 34, but it still feels like i’m still only learning how to live and breathe God – and not live for myself.

Life with God is so amazing and fun. Looking forward to more adventures with him – forever.

***

Oh yes, yesterday they threw a surprise birthday party for me.
Khang has the details and photos of that adventure over on his website.

Thanks for all the love and friendship.
Even if you guys did trick me to get me to show up there!

so, the Easter conference (MEC) is over now – and we really praise God and thank him for all the love he poured out on the conference.

When i came back, i was thinking about my life out here in the UK. I never imagined coming out here, and having the life that I have now – sometimes it just seems so surreal.

Sometimes i wish i could share or explain to my family the joy, the heartache, the wonder, the celebration – well, the life that I have out here.

***

Well, this year’s easter conference i found myself constantly stretched, and put into situations where i didn’t know what to say, or how to pray – and each time, God just led me, and burned in my heart his love, so that I could pray with passion, and know what to say and do…

you know…there’s so much i’m longing to express… but will probably throw that stuff down another time, in another way instead of this rambling mess…

thx.